How to Set Realistic Goals and Expectations

Hence, to help you achieve your goals in the most effective way possible, here are a few ways to set realistic goals for yourself:

1) Connect your every goal to a “why.”

In an article, “5 Ways to Make Sure You Achieve Your Goals This Year,” by author, Allison Walsh writes that “achieving goals becomes easier when they’re connected to a reason and purpose.”

When you spend time understanding the purpose that’s driving your actions, it’s easier to avoid distractions and focus on pursuing your goal. 

2) Break your goals down.

Instead of setting one big goal, break them down into smaller goals that you can accomplish every day. For instance, if you want to read 50 books this year, figure out how many books you’d have to read in 90 days: 10 books. Then, you can plan out a schedule to attain the small goal you set.

3) Schedule “buffer time” for your goals.

According to author Kristi DePaul, one of the reasons we struggle to meet our goals is that we overestimate our capabilities and underestimate external factors that can affect us.

In her article, “This is Why You Keep Missing Deadlines,” she writes that one way to overcome this fallacy is to increase your estimated deadline by 25%. For instance, if you think launching the new website will take four weeks, set aside one extra week for any unexpected delays. 

Another strategy is to “add intermittent milestones (think of them as mini-deadlines) to keep you on track along the way.” For instance, set aside a few hours every day for focused work. 

4) Don’t dwell on past failures.

The dark side of setting goals is that we’re likely to fail. While this may be a harsh reality, know that it’s normal and everyone goes through a cycle of ups and down. With that said, if your past failures are negatively affecting your confidence to pursue new goals, there are ways to move past these feelings and motivate yourself.

In their article, “Why We Set Unattainable Goals,” Haiyang Yang, Antonios Stamatogiannakis, Amitava Chattopadhyay, and Dipankar Chakravarti, share a few strategies to help you achieve short or long-term goals, and overcome the fear of failure.

• Celebrate the small wins. Suppose your goal last year was to get an A in Biology but you got a B instead. Remind yourself that this is progress and proof that you’re capable of making a change for the better. You did achieve something, so celebrate that.

• Think about “accidental” or related benefits.Sometimes, pursuing a goal is not about the destination, it’s about the journey. Ask yourself: What did I learn about myself while trying to reach my goal?

• Ask for an objective analysis. Although you shouldn’t dwell on your failures, it is important to understand why you failed. One simple approach is to ask a friend or family member for a “post-failure autopsy.” Ask: “Why do you think I failed?” They may give you a reality check that will help you better understand yourself.